Friday, January 28, 2011

A QUARTER of a Century!!!

And it begins!

Today I turned twenty-five years old. My thoughts? I have mixed feelings.

When I was younger, I thought that at twenty-five I would have life figured out. I would know where I have been, where I was heading and probably how to use a sewing machine. Now twenty-five, I realized that I am farther from being omniscient than I was when I was ten. **sigh**

Twenty-five means a lot of things to me. First and foremost, cheaper car insurance. (Got to get my priorities straight, right?) But it means that getting older is inevitable. When I was younger, on my birthday I was never worried, because even though I was a year older, I was still “young”.  Sixteen turning seventeen, no big deal – I was still a teenager. Twenty one turning twenty two – at least I was still in my “early twenties.” I got my new driver’s license today. It will expire when I am thirty. I will be thirty in five years. I am almost thirty.

Why am I in tears typing that sentence? I can remember a time not that long ago that I thought thirty was old – and now I am almost there. I don’t want to rush time, I never have. But yet it continues to speed by, and what I thought was a lazy river is actually a raging rapid thrusting me towards the inevitable adulthood.

What will these next years bring? More schooling, kids, wearing a one piece bathing suit, and relying on coffee to make it through my day? Being twenty-five is scary because it’s the doorway that leads into the land of grown ups… and I don’t think I am ready. I haven’t even cooked a casserole yet!

But onward I go.

I created my 25X25 list because I was scared. I was scared I wouldn’t be ready to be an adult. I had not lived life and before I knew it, those young adult doors would close and I wouldn’t be able to learn how to be an adult – I would just be an incompetent one.  I didn’t tell anyone about my fear until tonight, when my parents called to wish me happy birthday and I was crying. “I don’t want to be thirty!” I sobbed into the phone.

“Jenny,” My mom replied slowly on the phone. “You are only twenty-five.”

I am only twenty-five.

After a sombered conversation with my parents, (turns out they were going to sing happy birthday to me until they heard my crying), I am not that old. Who really is?

It’s all about perspective.

My parents said it didn’t feel like twenty-five years ago when I was born, or when they heard Reagan’s speech about the Challenger Explosion. To them, it was much like “yesterday”. “Yesterday” doesn’t sound as scary or threatening - nor does “tomorrow”. There will be a time that my “tomorrow” might mean thirty, forty, or fifty. And you know what, I think I might be okay with that. Because if “yesterday” or “tomorrow” doesn’t have a set time, why does “adulthood” or “grown up” have to be? Perhaps I have already been acting grown up, perhaps it IS all about perspective…

So I will use my 25X25 list as a challenge. A challenge to live life. Not a list of things I must accomplish in order to fully become an adult. And after I turn 26, I will create that “bucket list” of things that I will continue to challenge myself to do as I turn thirty, forty, or fifty.

I invite you to follow my 25x25 challenge, my journey as I attempt to figure out me, life, and why my room creates pink dust. (Sorry, slightly off topic.) You can find my list that I will *hopefully* accomplishing this year under the “25x25” header on the upper right portion of the page. As I complete them, they will have links to those associated blog posts. Become a follower, leave a comment, create your own list of things you would like to do in your life. Live.

Take care! (And tomorrow I start my first challenge… staying off Facebook for 25 days! Wish me luck!!)

1 comment:

Kaitlyn said...

Happy birthday, Jenny! Great perspective. For one, 25 is NOT old hahaha! And for two, you're only as old as you feel. Good luck with the facebook challenge!!